“It’s 46°C Outside,” wonders Mr CoolHead. “Are you sure you wanna do it?”
“More than anything,” I reply with confidence.
“What is it that you are dying to shop,” He continues.
“Are you coming?” I look in his eyes.
“I never said ‘No’. Thing is, it’s too hot out there,” He tries to clarify.
“Even this killing heat won’t scare me today,” I am so determined.
Any Mother would be.
Just imagine a situation when you are spending happy fun time with your darling daughter; Just the two of you. You suddenly feel like hearing some good admiring words (obviously in your praise). So you start the conversation:
“Love you princess. Do you love mamma?” (I know that’s stupid thing to ask, but I do ask her many a times 😉 ).
“Yes,” She nodded her head cutely.
“How much?” Mamma wanted more.
“Poora,” She spread he arms to the max.
“Oh my baby. Mamma also loves you, Poora, Poora!”I tried to hide her in my embrace.
“Where’s Papa?” She might have guessed the next question. So she pre-acted.
I thought of teasing her a little. Hence, I said, “He’s gone to USA.”
What? Why? And she started crying.
I made her calm. “Why do you cry darling? I am here with you.”
Very innocently she replied, “How will I catch my school bus?” Papa gives me a bath, combs my hair, packs my school bag and buys me candies?”
I felt snubbed, “I (putting my hands on my chest), your mamma, will do that honey.”
“No you can’t! You go to your work so early!” (Oh! She is right and intelligent too.)
“Ah. In that case, let’s call Papa back today only, in-fact right now. But tell me one thing, is there anything that I do for you?” I was positive.
“Yes Mamma! You help in completing my homework.” (That was relieving. Little girl has some gratitude).
“And…”I raised my eyebrows and widened my lips curiously.
“And…She looked to the roof. “That’s all.” And she started playing with her toys.
“That is all!”(I squeezed my eyebrows). “Okay. I am not losing on it. Baby, try to remember! There might be something.”
“Mamma, let me play!”She was uninterested.
“Is it so!” I have to tell her myself. I also do stuff.”I talked to myself but she is too young to understand that. But there’s no harm in talking without a voice.
[“Sweetheart, you remember that tasty, mouth-watering food you eat, Mamma prepares that; I clean the mess that you create every day, I do the dishes, and not to mention the never-ending laundry. You wear these beautiful dresses because I do a lot of thinking and shopping for you. I am the one who participates in your school competitions for parents and come out winner. I have to do a lot of brainstorming, you know. I plan all the family outings, take your pictures and treasure all your childhood memories. And, I…(pause).]
She hugged me, “I love you Ma.”
“I know you do beta.” (But inside there was a feeling of inadequacy. No doubt, I am doing everything I can but does it even matter? She doesn’t know or remember anything. Everything’s trivial. I am not doing anything ‘considerable’. All she remembers is what I am not doing!)
It’s not happening to me. I’ll have to work to be noticed. I think it’s time to add something interesting to the daily routine.
All said, now you understand why I am rushing out in that baking heat. I am going to bring some new indoor games which we three can play together and wish that next time when I again ask her the same silly question, she has something more to say. 🙂
So basically I am going inside the oven and hoping that when the timer beeps, a better mother comes out. Better… than what I was… before having this conversation.