Yes, As a woman, I feel scared of this society of which I am the significant half.
I am aware of the fact that I am the mother of this society, still, I am not sure if my existence has any value anymore! Humanity has lost its meaning and it’s shocking how the ‘other-half’ of the society is desperate to erase the difference between a man and a beast.
A man who is also a protective father, a caring brother, a loving son, a dependable partner, and a faithfull friend, it is strange but true that it is a man only who is responsible for the harming women like no one.
I see faces…of man, many innocent, handsome, curious, confused and some tired too, and I dare to search for the devil somewhere quiescent underneath these very worldly faces. I admit I am full of doubts about the genuineness of all the faces as if they seem to have worn some kind of masks…to deceive the world… during the day or at respective homes or in workplaces. As soon as there is an opportunity or the cover of darkness, I wonder how many faces succeed in keeping these masks on, and how many unmask the real monster face!
Whenever I go somewhere, it’s my first priority to finish the task before dark so that I come back home… safe. Reason, I know staying out late is an invitation for trouble, and who knows, it might cost me something as precious as my life also! So better be safe than sorry!
When I sit in an auto-rickshaw, I tend to scan each and every face getting on and off, on the way. I subconciously yet constantly monitor the driver in the mirror. Does he look decent? What does his eyes say? Is he familiar to any of the passengers? My mind is busy in all sort of thoughts (obviously negative ones).
I double check before sitting, for its difficult to trust humanity, (read ‘Man’ity). More than one man in there makes me skeptical. What if they forced me to an obscure place? What would I do? How am I gonna save myself? My entire focus is am I in the right place or not?
Most of energy goes in thinking, thinking and… thinking. I AM ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT MY SAFETY….I am not safe as a kid, I am not safe as a girl, I am not safe as a woman…and worse, I am not safe even in the dusk of my life!
Is being a woman, a boon or a bane? Am I not needed on this earth? Or Am I needed just to be used (misused) like an object?
I too am a human, a full fledged living being. I have all my senses working. I get scared; I feel pain. My life is equally important as that of any man.
Then Why is it so hard for a man to consider me a human?
(This post is the reaction to the incident of gangrape of a school girl in my state. Word rape has become so common that people take it just as another news and move on. Has anyone ever thought that what kind of impression is it putting on the mind of women folk? How is it affecting their psyche? Well, if such crimes continue to occur, the time is not far when, instead of rejoicing, a woman would feel ashamed to be a mother and sorrowful on the birth of a boy!)