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Empowerment,  Humour,  Parenting

No ‘Gudiya’ after a ‘Pudiya’


In India, festival fever is in-the-air. After pleasing our ancestors, we recently celebrated ‘Navratras’. Many of us queued up the temples; stayed grainless for days; did every sort of religious stuff and searched for ‘little girls’ to be worshiped (‘Kanya Poojan’) in order to complete this many-days-long ritual.

Because of prevailing ‘Girls paucity’, booking starts beforehand. Ironically, we never mind standing and waiting for hours in the streets for little girls, for a proclaimed worship but not many of us want to hear, ‘it’s a girl!’, while waiting outside the delivery room. Why this double standard?


I remember, when my daughter was born, many visitors were awfully grief-bound as I had to go through a ‘Caesarean’, and that too ‘for a girl!’It bemused me, more because such remarks came from ‘women’ themselves!

Nature itself has chosen ‘woman,’ as the life bearer. Only she can procreate. In simple words, without a ‘She’, there can be no ‘He’. But does ‘The Society,’ acknowledge this indispensable role of ‘her’ or even her existence?


We live in such a society where you don’t have to do any research to answer this question. There are countless incidents on regular basis where woman is denied of her basic rights and is treated with bias. A country where a girl is supposed to be form of Goddess, crimes against her have reached their zenith. Some are shushed even before they can make their first sound. Many, who escape, are subjected to every possible mistreatment such as child-abuse, eve-teasing, honour- killing, dowry, domestic-violence, etc. Who is to be blamed? Humanity is moving to its ugliest nadir.


Last year was a happening year in our country’s history as many initiatives were taken to safeguard the well-being of a ‘She’. Most advertised and adopted was, “Beti Bachao, Beti Parao” (Save and Educate a Girl Child). Every nook and corner was buzzing with related activities.

I was awestruck, “What time is it when someone else has to tell you not to kill your own unborn baby. Don’t you have enough heart and able mind, not to do it?


The longing for boys is so deep-rooted in their psyche that people don’t feel ashamed to go to any extent (sometimes unbelievable). When I was expecting, some elderly women would forecast the sex of the unborn child. One of them once asked, “Did you take the medicine?

My answer was ‘Yes’, as was properly following the meds prescribed by the physician.

Bet, it’s a boy then! Even your body language tells that”.

I was thinking about the connection between the medicines and sex of my un-born child!

On discovering what kind of medicine was being talked about, I was astonished and the ladies continued, “Everyone takes them and it’s a sure thing.”

I was literally laughing inside, “If making boys”, is such an easy job, what are our medical scientists on Earth doing?  They should stop researching in the lab, instead start searching these sure ‘sex-determiners’, as soon as possible.

Jokes apart, it’s a bitter truth, women (sometime educated too) go to such self-styled docs (willingly or forcibly) who give them some sort of ‘Pudiya’ (Packet) and after nine months… “It’s a baby boy!” (As told).

So finally, you know the ‘geniuses’ behind the declining ‘female-ratio’ in some parts of our country! Work is already in progress to make our country ‘smoke-free’, ‘plastic-free’, ‘porn-free’, and ‘pollution-free’. Who knows, may be some day, with such a mind-set, we will succeed in achieving the target of making entire region ‘girls-free’? – “No kidding!”


  • Sha'Tara

    Fact: Misogyny is deeply rooted in all “Iron Age” societies. To understand it, people would have to know, then accept, their real roots and history in time – something the Matrix; the System; the Status Quo – is desperate to prevent from happening. There is nothing normal or natural about misogyny, but the System fears “Woman” because she could change everything on this world were she allowed the freedom to be herself. Wars, oppression, competition, violence, mindless exploitation of every and all natural resources until nothing is left, that is the madness that a free, self-empowered woman would not support. But women are pressured to conform to the violence of the Matrix, crushed in a vise of lies, put-downs, innuendos that result in disempowerment and in remaining a slave to men. This is as true in the Western “Christian” world as in India and China.

    There is much talk about this problem on social media but very little is changing anywhere because it’s an “Age” problem. Either we confront the teaching and beliefs of this “Age” and destroy it; or it destroys the planet; or perhaps we can outlive it and come out, much dwindled in numbers, much humbled, to rebuild after it has passed. This is a dark “Age” and technology has both, masked its darker side and helped to empower the darkness, exacerbating to old evils: religious oppression and suppression, racism, financial slavery and misogyny. It is said, keep your friends close, your enemies closer. I have always maintained; know your enemy; know its face; know its purpose; know its source of power. The Matrix holds tremendous sway over mankind and I have studied the source of that power in history. There is a key to freeing ourselves from the madness of Power, but each and every individual must find it by herself, then learn how to use it without getting “caught.” For example, given the opportunity, should a woman intent on liberating her sisters become a politician, get elected? My answer is “no.” That is exactly what the System wants because to “rule” in a male-dominated system the woman has to emulate male arrogance and has to accept a male agenda in order to stay in power.

    Maybe, in these trying times of anthropocentric climate change and expanding resource wars that threaten the ability of this world to maintain life, enough women will find their key to female/goddess empowerment to cause a gradual disempowerment of dominant forces in religion, politics and finance – for these three are linked to maintain a force intent on keeping this planet in darkness and spiritual, mental and physical slavery.

      • Kally

        I’m assuming Gudiya is “Traditional Indian slang referring to one who is American but is still fobby by way of watching/listening to too many Bollywood movies/songs. Over time, definition has evolved to a person who has qualities of clumsiness and has odd likes”

        I got this googling for the description. Correct me if I’m wrong.

      • Mann Kaundal

        Ha ha…Google can sometime make us believe things which don’t even exist…and if it means so then its a new word in my lexicon.
        Just to tell you Gudiya is the hindi version of DOLL and in this particular post I referred it to a “girl child”…:)

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